00:01 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Are you an aspiring leader who knows you have more to offer but you can't seem to get ahead? Do you frequently feel overwhelmed and under-supported? Listen to the Overcome to Become podcast as we talk about actionable tasks and mindsets that you can apply to begin leading yourself. Hi, I'm Dr Angela Buckley, your host and author of the Strength in Nature Leadership Series and Likeable Leadership Reflection Journals. I'm a mother, consultant, triathlete and coach In Overcome to Become. I share with you the science-backed and experienced proven lessons I've learned in my own leadership journey to beat burnout.
00:38
What would you do? You're trying to escape the throes of Hurricane Helene. You're trying to get to your daughter's wedding. You are intent on walking her down the aisle, but everything is working against you. There are floods, the bridges are out and there's mud. The roads are closed and you find yourself 30 miles from your destination. The roads are closed and you find yourself 30 miles from your destination. Meet my guest, david Jones, who managed to get to the wedding on time. David Jones, thank you so much for joining us today.
01:18
We are here to record our episode of Overcome to Become. It's a podcast where we are helping people overcome overwhelm, helping them beat burnout and really using mindset tips, tricks, life hacks to move forward in their life. I would love if you would share with us your journey, a little bit of your background, if you would share with us your journey, a little bit of your background, because I think that so much of the way you have chosen to live your life has put you in a position to really exemplify and bring forward a story that the world needs to hear and benefits from your presence in it. So is that an acceptable starting point for us?
02:06 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Oh sure, yeah, that's good, angela, thank you. Thank you for having me inviting me to be here today. I've been looking forward to this and going back into my background. I'm an engineer by training. I've got engineering degrees from Purdue and the University of Tennessee. 25 years in corporate America, but I always found my center of gravity, so, in other words, I would tend to lean back towards quality and business excellence. It just seemed to be where I had the best fit. I did I don't know six years in marketing and sales and did a stint in design, engineering and production in high-tech electronics, but I always seem to come back to business excellence. How can we be as good as we possibly can be? How can we reach our full potential? And 25 years into that, the company I worked for was sold.
03:09
The new owner was moving operations offshore happens every day right yeah, and so I was fortunate to be able to teach at the university level. And then David McClaskey, a good friend of mine, called and he was running something called the PALS Business Excellence Institute.
03:34 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Okay.
03:35 - David M. Jones (Guest)
And that was based around a restaurant chain, pals Sudden Service. They're one of the best run businesses in the world. I'm not exaggerating. Few people have heard of them because they're small and they're regional, but they really know their stuff and people that did hear of them would come and say, hey, can we learn from you, can we spend a day with your CEO, can you give us a tour of your stores? And so in a very pals like systematic fashion they set up the Business Excellence Institute and that so they had a way of teaching and sharing that didn't interrupt their restaurant operations. You know what made them so great?
04:20
So David was growing that and he reached out to me to see if I'd be interested in joining. He needed somebody who could teach, who could consult, who could speak at conferences and events, and so I was honored. That was an easy decision to make. It's like, yeah, go join a team of all-stars, you know some of the best in the world. You know it was a no-brainer. So I did that for seven years or so until COVID and pals had done the business excellence thing for about 20 years and they were ready to move on. 85% of our work was in person, so that sort of came to its natural end, but I still have a passion for this, so I started my own business. Excellent Consulting yeah, absolutely, the Excellence Advisory, in fact, to use your word. There is the name, and so that's where I'm at today helping leaders lead in a way that takes their organization from good to great. I'm not the emergency room doctor, I'm the fitness coach or the wellness coach, and I help you take your great or your good organization and make it great.
05:51 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That is fantastic. So I understand that part of that consulting is also leadership development, mindset development, and I think I have to touch base a little bit I also am an engineer by training awesome lean, six sigma black belt and then moving into all of the operations mindset onboarding, development, things. So I think our careers have some similar paths. Yes, paths, yes. So talk to me, what are you doing now? Are you coaching? Are you advising? Are you creating leadership systems for organizations? How does that fit for you right now?
06:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, so I'm doing a fair amount of public speaking, which I really enjoy because it's a one to many right, so we can gain some leverage from that. I'm doing some teaching. I have courses. I have one day and two day courses that I teach and there's a half day version, which is a really good course but really takes one day to really yes. Yeah, because at the end of my classes you're not just walking out, you're setting an action plan and I do a 30-day follow-up call to make sure everybody is actually implementing their plan. So it takes a little while to get into that. So one day courses, it's just like perfect timing. So I teach that and I do coach and consult with leaders and their teams to help guide them.
07:37
Typically it's either an enterprise-wide initiative or a transformation of some sort. Yeah, again, going from a position of being really good at what they do to how can we take this to the next level? I don't know of any organizations that start out at the top. We all have to work our way up. You know incremental, step-by-step improvement after improvement, we work our way up. You know incremental, step by step improvement after improvement, we work our way up, and so I that's what I do. I help people do that.
08:11 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
When you go into organizations, do you also select? Have you met organizations that said I want to get better, but then maybe they aren't in line with the types of changes that you are proposing? Do you ever just say no?
08:29 - David M. Jones (Guest)
I've not reached that point, but what I have seen is because I'm almost always working with the top leaders, so by the time they come to me they're ready, yeah, and so that works. But what happens is there are people on their team who are not ready, so there's a period of time there where we either get them ready or they self-select out.
08:58
They do Like, you know, it's not for them, it's usually around 10%, okay, it's not for them, it's usually around 10 percent that they say you know, this is not what I came here for. This is not me, this is, you know, not, not what I'm used to. I think it's time for me to move on, and that's a win for everybody, because that allows them to find a home where they feel more comfortable and that allows the organization to find somebody to replace them, to bring them in, that has that mindset that they're looking for.
09:31 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That's a that's fantastic. It's. There's always growth, and growth looks different for different people, right, and they're in different parts of their journey. So it's an opportunity for everybody, really, even if they don't always feel like it. It really is. So, david, one of the reasons that I came to know you is because we've been of walking after the hurricane to go to your daughter's wedding. Can you tell me a little bit about your evening? I've heard some of it, of course, but share your mindset. When you were leaving, I feel like I picked up your, were you? When you were leaving, I feel like I picked up your story somewhere, like you were already getting out of the car, but what about leaving? Just getting into the car the night before? Sure, where were you emotionally, if you don't mind sharing, and where was your focus? And then, right, how did you get through that evening and get to the point where you made a decision to abandon your vehicle?
10:49 - David M. Jones (Guest)
okay, great question and I appreciate this longer form discussion because I've been in a lot of interviews. Um, you know a lot of national news agencies and whatnot and they are just like one, two, three minutes, boom, boom, boom, boom, hard to tell the whole story.
11:06 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
And so there's people out there that are kind of you know some of the naysayers that are out there, they haven't heard the whole story and they haven't heard the whole story and, as an endurance athlete, I think one of the things that I also want to get to is, like you have so many years of preparation, this wasn't a rash decision, right? So you were on Drew Barrymore, I saw you, it was a couple minutes right, and it's such a wonderful experience, but you didn't get to tell the whole story. So if you have time to share with us, how, how did you get in the situation? Obviously we had a hurricane coming up and then you needed to get to your daughter's wedding the next day, but there's many hours in between point a and point b here. So even before you left the house, where were you mentally?
12:00 - David M. Jones (Guest)
so, uh, mentally I was excited.
12:03
This, you know um, it was crazy day sure my wife and I just moved to boiling springs, south carolina, this summer. We were living in johnson city, tennessee. We still have our house in tennessee. We haven't put it on the market yet. The goal was on fr Friday to drive up for my daughter's wedding Elizabeth is her name. Drive up on Friday for the Saturday wedding there was also a Sunday celebration Sure and then drive back. It's a two-hour drive on a normal day.
12:37
Hurricane Helene crashed the party and really messed things up. Hurricane Helene crashed the party and really messed things up. So we weathered the storm here in Boiling Springs. That's where I am right now. We weathered the storm here and lost power, lost internet, lost cell phone service, but I had a generator. I got it set up and going. I got some gas for that. I had to scramble to find gas because everybody was out finding gas. Afterwards, got all that going, got a good portion of the debris cleaned up and we changed our plan so that now I would go on up and if the roads were clear I'd call back to Debbie, my wife, and say, hey, roads are clear, come on up. And she would come up Saturday for the Saturday wedding and Sunday celebration. So immediately we were sort of you know, in that mode of all right plans have been disrupted. Let's be agile here. Let's just figure this out on the fly and be safe about it.
13:46
Normally a two-hour drive from Johnson City, or from Boiling Springs to Johnson City, just right up Interstate 26. Well, seven hours into the drive I reached quote unquote the end of the road. And along the way my mindset was all right what's next? What's next? I would clear a hurdle, I would get around, you know, a detour, I would drive through roads with downed power lines and downed trees. And you know, normally when a hurricane reaches this far inland and I've been through several over the years it's just rain, it's dissipated by the time it gets this far north. So I wasn't expecting I don't think anybody else was expecting the magnitude of the devastation.
14:43
So I was learning as I went. I had no cell phone service, I had no internet, so I didn't. I wasn't aware of any reports or anything up ahead. I just had to learn as I went. So it was constant adjustment, constant trying things out. The GPS in my car worked, so I was able to use that. Of course, you know, as soon as you get off the route, it just tells you to make a U-turn and go back to the route. So you know it wasn't a perfect tool, but it was good enough to help me keep moving northward until I literally got to the end of the road. There was a group of state troopers there getting everybody off exit 43. It's the Temple Hill Road exit in East Tennessee.
15:32 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Forever emboldened in your brain. Now right.
15:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Exactly yes. And I asked them, you know, is there any way I can get through to Johnson City? And they said, no, nobody's getting through, We've got it blocked off. Well, I had already, you know, maneuvered for seven hours.
15:51
I'm thinking I just got to maneuver again. I'm going to try and talk these guys into it, and they're like no, you don't understand. The bridges have been totally washed out, they're gone. No car can get through. Washed out, they're gone, there's no car can get through. So the magnitudes began hitting again for me, and so I said what about the back roads? And they said no, they're washed out too, and we really don't know the full extent. This was two in the morning. By this point. We don't know the full extent of the destruction there. We're not letting anybody drive on any of the roads anywhere. Okay, sir, what about on foot? He says, sir, the best thing you can do is go back to your car and spend the night there. Maybe in the morning we'll be able to open some roads and you can get on through.
16:43
Well, that was just a very small glimmer of hope and I couldn't hang my vision of walking my daughter down the aisle very firmly implanted in my head. I couldn't hang that on a maybe. So I went back to my car, grabbed my backpack, shaving kit, a couple of other things that I might need for the next couple of days, Turned on my cell phone light, started my Garmin watch and off I went down the road. I knew pretty much where I needed to go. There was someone there who showed me a map, so I knew what roads I needed to take.
17:23
And off I went into the darkness, into the night and just figured I have three ways I can win. One is I get there. I get to walk my daughter down the aisle. It's two in the morning. I've got until 11 o'clock to get there and I'm supposed to be there at 10 for pictures. But at worst case I could show up at 11 and we'd be fine.
17:47
Uh, number two I could get far enough to where there's internet service and I could tell them what's going on, alert them. You know what's happening. Maybe, maybe somehow get somebody to come get me or something you you know. The farther I get, the better. And third was I can't really get very far at all, but I can bring back a report to the state troopers and help clear up some of the fog of war that was existing at that point because it was so early after the event. So that was my mindset, is that I'm going to win one early after the event. So that was my mindset, is that I'm gonna win one way or the other. I've got that ultimate goal and I kept telling each of the officers. And if you wanna hear the story about the bulldozer in the backhoe, I can tell you that one too.
18:40 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I think we need to talk about that in a few minutes.
18:42 - David M. Jones (Guest)
yes, Okay, I told everybody that I encountered, which wasn't a lot I mean, you know it's the middle of the night in the mountainous region but I said my daughter's getting married at 11 o'clock and I'm going to be there to walk her down the aisle. That became my soundtrack. If you're familiar with John Acuff and his book Soundtracks, that was my soundtrack. I repeat it to myself and to others on my journey.
19:10 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Did you coach yourself in first person or third person? Oh, it's a science question. That's a science question.
19:22 - David M. Jones (Guest)
That's a good question.
19:25 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Did you say I am going to walk her down? Or when times were like maybe tough or something, did you say David, you can do this.
19:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
I said I, I am going to walk her down. Okay, I don't know what that says scientifically. I'd be interested to hear.
19:42 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I don't know what that says scientifically. I'd be interested to hear the research shows. Like again with endurance athletes if you self-coach yourself, you can do this. They show sometimes 10% improvement, like when you're doing those final pushes or something. So the affirmations, the soundtracks, are important, but then when you're getting to the point where you're like on that edge, where the soundtrack isn't carrying you cause soundtrack has a lot to do with your why, but sometimes you need a cheerleader. So when you coach yourself in third person, they see a greater push, a greater performance delivery than when you coach yourself in person.
20:27 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Interesting.
20:28 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
So curious Okay.
20:32 - David M. Jones (Guest)
So that was my mindset. As you mentioned, I am an endurance athlete, I run marathons, I've run 11 marathons, I run marathons, I've run 11 marathons and I knew when I started out that I was about 20 or 30 miles from home, from my destination. So that was easy, that was a non-factor. I know I can do this distance, that's not a problem, and I also have faith. So it was like OK, god, me and you, we're on this, let's go.
21:11
And he definitely was with me the whole way for sure Gives me chills. Well, there were times where I spoke a little louder to him than that. So one of them was when I started to walk. The roads were fine. There were occasional tree down or a limb down. It was, you know, no big deal.
21:31
But then I started to get into areas where the road was washed out. Debris was ankle deep, you know, not a real big deal either. You just, you know, with the light I had, I could see and kind of pick my way through there, still staying on the road or what was the road, and I came across a bulldozer and a backhoe that were clearing the way and this was probably about. I'd have to go back and look at my Garmin recording of my trick, but it was probably about 3 or 3, 30 in the morning and they are just zooming around. You know, the bulldozer is pushing stuff and backing up and pushing, so just trying to get the debris off the road, and the backhoe is swinging around and scooping stuff up and dropping it on the other side and coming back, and they're furiously working. If I wasn't in that position, it would have been fun to watch because these guys were professionals, they were really going at it, but I got to get through here and there's no way I can get through with them doing that.
22:47 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I'm not fast enough to dodge them and I don't want to. They would win right.
22:49 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, they would win that physics equation yes.
22:51 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Yeah.
22:51 - David M. Jones (Guest)
So I'm waving my cell phone, like trying to get the attention of the bulldozer driver who was closer to me, closer to where I was coming from, and he was startled Like where did you come from? You know, in the middle of the night, after a hurricane, you know a person walking and so he was kind enough to stop and I talked to him for a minute and I said I'm really trying to get to Johnson City. He said I don't think you can get through this road. It's completely blocked with debris. Get through. This road is completely blocked with debris.
23:26
And the piles of debris were, you know, six, seven, eight feet high, that they were pushing off the roads. And I said, well, I got to try. My daughter's getting married at 11 o'clock in Johnson City and I'm going to be there to walk her down the aisle. So he said, well, okay, let me radio the other guy and see if I can get him to stop. He did and I scooted on by and thanked him and and there was a pile. This, this storm deposited the debris in this, in this section, across the road yeah not along it or neatly piled next to it.
24:04
It completely blocked the road side to side and it was about, I'd say, six or seven feet high at least, and it was a tangled mess of debris so big like three feet around trees, big long, yeah, and and what looked like fence posts and materials from barns or fences, you know farm stuff all tangled. And I'm shining my light, trying to see if I can find a way to climb up over this, and just the way it was tangled and all the branches and things sticking out. I couldn't find a way. So I started to look to go around it and sure enough, it looked like over on the left-hand side I could just scoot right around the end and, you know, walk on the shoulder area, which you know, it's all just weeds and grass and ditch. But I gave it a try and that was a mistake. I stepped down into what.
25:13
It was muddy but it was like quicksand and I just sunk right to my knees in quicksand and it kind of pulled me down like into a seated position. I got my back. Yeah, it was because I couldn't move and the backhoe had started up again. Because I couldn't move and the backhoe had started up again, oh my gosh. So now I'm thinking it's just a matter of time before he finishes the pile he's working on and he comes over for this one, and I don't think he can see me. There's no way.
25:49
So that's when I kind of got vocal with the Lord and said I need your help. And I was able to get my right leg out, but the mud pulled my shoe off and I thought there's no way I can make this without shoes. So I found a place where I could set my cell phone. I didn't want to set it down in the mud and you know, but I needed the light. So I found a place in the roots of this one big tree that was there to hold it, so I could dig down through the mud and find my shoe and then kind of stand up. I was trying to I'm kind of seated, but keeping my one leg from going back down in. Anyway, I was able to make my way back up to the roadway and was in, I'd say, some haste.
26:51
There was no panic, but there was haste that this backhoe driver would swing that boom around and knock me into oblivion. So I didn't even take time to put my shoe on. I heaved it over the pile over the other side and I found a gap down like the big tree trunk, the the branches were holding it up.
27:20
Oh, just so you had a little tunnel, sort of yes oh my I got down on my hands and knees and I crawled into this pile and then I got up on another tree and sort of barrel rolled over it and then down and under some more and I worked my way out the other side Right there, that's an adventure.
27:44
Yeah, that was, and so it was just one more part of now what's next? So I got to find my shoe. I found a puddle. I put my shoe on and found a puddle and danced around in there to wash the mud off and I went on down. I went. You know there's an on-ramp to the interstate. One of the troopers had said the interstate was closed down so that you know, maybe I can get up on there. But I came up and I went up up the on-ramp and then down the road and the bridge was washed out and it looked like the worst Hollywood disaster movie you'd ever seen movie you'd ever seen. All the debris strewn on the interstate and then the the collapsed bridge and the mangled concrete. So there was no way I could climb down in there. There was still rushing water Right, so I had to turn around and go back. There was one bridge in the town of Erwin, e-r-w-i-n. Irwin, tennessee. There was one bridge that wasn't washed out but they weren't sure of its structural integrity so they really didn't want anybody crossing it.
29:06 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Right.
29:07 - David M. Jones (Guest)
The troopers told me when I set out on foot that you know they're not going to let you cross that bridge. When I got to the bridge, the troopers that were guarding it were actually out on patrol walking. They were out, so I didn't ask for permission, I didn't wait around for them to come back, I just scooted right on across and from then on, the majority of the destruction was behind me, of the destruction was behind me. So once you got across the river, correct, yes, and so at that point then I'm probably still 15 or 20 miles from home, but I know that it's mostly I'm thinking I don't know. I'm thinking that it's mostly I'm thinking I don't know. I'm thinking that it's mostly just walking from here on out.
29:57
I'm going to be on my guard for whatever's next.
30:00 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Right.
30:02 - David M. Jones (Guest)
And just keep going.
30:03 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Yes. So when I teach leadership and operations, development, operations, excellence, one of my favorite questions is always how do you run a marathon?
30:18 - David M. Jones (Guest)
One step at a time.
30:19 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Thank you, exactly Right, and I feel like, as you've come up every single obstacle that was in front of you, you didn't allow yourself to be disturbed or turned back, but you just said one more step.
30:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
That's right. I had the vision of walking my daughter down the aisle. I teach this in my business right Yep Vision, mission and values. So I had that vision. My mission was to get to the church on time I'm on this march and my values were centered around family and perseverance. Fitness certainly played a big role in this. It's probably my my number one survival tool was my fitness on this journey.
31:06
You know, I, I, I wasn't afraid of it, but I know people who are not in shape might think twice about, you know, even attempting it.
31:16 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
But also presence of mind. You were present at every moment through your journey. In my opinion, listening to you now right a few times tell this story your sense of presence, brought along with the confidence and the conversations that you had with the Lord along the way, allows you to not get overwhelmed by I lost my shoe in the mud and it allows you to decide to go around or through, like you literally went over around and through to grandma's house right like oh yeah that sense of presence and the and the fact that you've run, so you develop the mindset associated with one step at a time yeah, how did you get there?
32:09 - David M. Jones (Guest)
absolutely yeah, and there were other piles of debris like that first one. I didn't have to go through them, I went over them, but it was exactly what you're saying is all right, what's next? We got that behind us. There was a complete focus on what's next. I don't need to worry about any of that stuff because I don't plan on turning back right. I have to. So, um, yeah, and I think that's important in business as well. We learn from what we've overcome, but we don't have to stay in it, we don't have to dwell in it. We're you know, the future is in front of us, not behind us. So let's pick up what we can that's helpful what we can learn from that, and keep going forward.
32:54
And I did pick up a couple of things along the way. For a while there, I was carrying a sharp stick that had sharp little branches on it that I didn't know if there's going to be any wildlife out there that was looking for its next meal after their habitat got destroyed. You know there's bears in that area. There's a lot of raccoons and skunks and things like that Barnyard dogs. So, you know, I picked up a tool to use along the way. Of course, there were plenty of sticks. There were plenty of sticks.
33:32 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That's okay.
33:34 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, and then later I picked up a reflector stake. You know those reflectors that people put out at the end of their driveway. That's, I picked that up because, once I got past the worst of it all, I was walking along the old highway, which is a narrow two lane road with no shoulders, no sidewalks or anything like that, and a car came by, much to my surprise, but I don't think he saw me either, even with my cell phone light.
34:02 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
He was probably surprised. If he saw you, he was probably also surprised, right?
34:06 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, exactly. So I grabbed this reflector stake and I used that like sort of held that over the road. I grabbed this reflector stake and I used that like sort of held that over the road and with my cell phone light, was you know any more? Traffic came along Wanted to let them know, and there were two or three other cars that came along and sure enough, they did slow down. It worked. So I think they didn't stop. No, and I didn't expect anybody to stop. This day and age there's someone out walking at four in the morning after a hurricane. I didn't expect that.
34:40
Now there was a state trooper that came up after I crossed that bridge and he pulled alongside and rolled his window down. He said are you the one that's trying to get to his daughter's wedding? And I chuckled. I said well. I said well, yes, sir, how did you know? And he said well, we're all talking about you. And I said, oh gosh, well, I hope it's nice. And he said, yeah, they all said you were determined.
35:10
Would you like a ride? He said I'm going into town. Would you like a ride into? He said I'm going into town. Would you like a ride into town? I said, oh, absolutely, If you weren't so ugly I would kiss you right now. Yes, I'd like a ride. So he laughed and he gave me a ride. To his I think it was a command post, it was the Irwin Town Hall, that's where he was headed so he dropped me off there and then toward sunrise the sky was just beginning to get light and I'm checking my pace and I'm thinking it's going to be close whether I make it on time or not A white truck pulled out from the side and he rolled his window down. He said would you like a ride? So in total the whole trek was 27 miles, 26.82.
36:02 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
So 27, 10 of it by car. Yeah, yeah.
36:08 - David M. Jones (Guest)
A little more than that. Yeah, 10 of it by car and 17 on foot.
36:13 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Okay, okay, that yeah, um 10 of it by car and 17 on foot. Okay did you, because I'm a garment wearing kind of gal as well. Okay, did you charge your watch before you took off?
36:26 - David M. Jones (Guest)
it. Um, I had, uh, during the day during the storm day, I I try and keep it uh full, and during the storm day I try and keep it full and the phone was the same way. I left it on the charger during the whole drive so I had a hundred percent on there. But I really was unprepared. You know, I didn't have a flashlight, I didn't have a raincoat, I had a little windbreaker. You know, I didn't have any of this sort of survival gear snacks. I had a water and a energy drink and that was it. So, um, but like I said before, I didn't anticipate anything even remotely close to this. But since then I have found a checklist of supplies that people should carry in their car and I'm getting that together for my car and my wife's car, so I'll be better prepared Because you know it doesn't have to be a hurricane. You know you can get a flat tire or your engine can quit or whatever. It's a good idea to be prepared.
37:33 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Do you carry flares in your car?
37:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
no I that's.
37:38 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That's a very so I I grew up in germany, and all the cars are required to have flares oh interesting they even come like there's a, there's a kit that'll come with your car where you store your things and it's like built into the boot, the trunk, um, and so it's interesting that so many us people do not have the flares like we talk about them. People know of them. You'll see occasionally the truckers using them, but it's not standard operating procedure in the united states the way it would be in Europe.
38:13 - David M. Jones (Guest)
That's interesting. Yeah, I've had more of a lean approach to what I carry in my car. I just like to keep it clean and tidy and not a tool bag or anything rumbling around in there. So I'm changing that.
38:32 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Okay, but they do go bad, so you have to update them from time to time.
38:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Oh, they age.
38:37 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
They will age, yeah so every couple years. You probably want to update that a little bit.
38:44
That's alright, eventually you'll have grandkids and you can like treat them like a firework and then replace them. You can be the cool grandpa with the flare. What else would you like to share about your story? I know this wasn't what you set out to do, right? You set out to be at your daughter's wedding, at Elizabeth's wedding, right. But now there's. I feel like the world has opened a little bit to your story. I know we've talked about missions that matter and father's love. What do you want to do now, going forward with this, with all the things you've already done, like you have these, it's a great little ball, right. What happens next?
39:38 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Well, that's a really good question, angela. I'm trying to Sort out where this goes. What happens next? There has been a lot of attention and it has been around. Next, there has been a lot of attention and it has been around. Here's some good news amongst all the bad news. So it's been uplifting to people and for that I'm, you know, grateful and happy to. You know, tell my story If it helps anybody, if it helps make their day, or Tell my story If it helps anybody, if it helps make their day or improves their day a little bit.
40:30
But the one and you mentioned it the one message that seems to resonate the most amongst all the others of perseverance and determination and focus, and all that is a father's love that comes up over and over again, and it comes up in two ways, which I find very interesting. One is, yep, that's what fathers do for their daughters, right, that's? My dad would have done that for me. And this is what parents do for their children, and very positive and affirming for their children, and very positive and affirming. But then there's the other side of people saying, well, I can't even get my dad to send me a text on my birthday or like we had on that one call with Chris Colt. My father died before I was born, and I had a succession of stepfathers that weren't all that great, and so the story is resonating on both sides, which is not typical most stories you know, especially this day and age where we have the red states and the blue states and then right, you're with me or you're not.
41:28 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Polarizing, polarizing.
41:30 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yes, this has resonated with both sides, and so that's where my radar is tuned the most. It looks like there's a need for this in the world Some affirmations for those who have that relationship with their dad, and some help or guidance or something for those that didn't, because if they didn't have that relationship with their father, it's not their fault.
42:09 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Right.
42:11 - David M. Jones (Guest)
And it shouldn't create a hole in their psyche and in the way they feel about themselves and the way they carry themselves, because it's not their fault and they always have a father in heaven and if they don't know him, I can introduce them to him. His name is God, so we'll see where it goes. I think in general, dads, fathers, we can all step up our game. I know I can, um, there's no question, and I I'm getting the sense that that's what the world needs right now.
42:53 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
You know, I feel like there is a small movement associated with gratitude, kindness and joy, and literally day well, basically the same day that you were taking your hike, I think, when I go look at the calendar, was the day that I had created the Gratitude Leadership Collective. Right, it was really. And so we've been having a lot of conversations on how do you use gratitude and I don't mean abuse, I mean like use right To grow inside, like yous right To grow inside to support the people that are around you, like that message of I care enough to literally go over around and through to be there for you to help you overcome those obstacles. And there were so many different players in your story. The policemen didn't stop you, they admired you, but they also didn't really help you.
44:00 - David M. Jones (Guest)
You know they were doing their jobs and I have nothing but praise for them no complaints Right.
44:06 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Different roles in a story.
44:09 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Right, exactly.
44:12 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
So, like I don't know, I'm trying to process how right. Right, exactly. So, like I don't know, I'm trying to process how right.
44:24 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Like, how do we help people become maybe more engaged in helping other people? Yeah, and we've seen an outpouring. You know, this part of South Carolina, upstate South Carolina, got hit. Then western North Carolina is obviously getting a lot of attention, and east Tennessee, in that Irwin and Unicoi County area, just got walloped and people are coming from all over the US donating supplies. In fact, many of the donation centers, the collection centers, are overwhelmed with supplies and they're asking for people to donate money instead, because this recovery effort is going to take a long time. Talk about marathons. This is a marathon recovery and so, um, you know, food is perishable, so, uh, donating cash. Right now I'm actually partnering with the red cross and the new york city marathon. They reached out to me and said would you mind, uh, joining running the race this year and raising funds for the Red Cross? And I said, sure, yeah, absolutely. I'm not in shape to run a marathon, so I wasn't planning on running a marathon this year.
45:46 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Yeah.
45:46 - David M. Jones (Guest)
So there'll be some walking involved in that.
45:51 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
There's a few hills in that course.
45:53 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, yeah, especially right there at the end of Central Park when you want it to be downhill, there's so many. Anyway, I'm looking forward to that. My family here in South Carolina. We've been involved in a small way in helping the recovery efforts, both through being sort of a grassroots distribution center, but also something simple that we hadn't thought about before. But the linemen that come in from all over the country to help prepare the lines, they need a place to wash their clothes or they need their clothes washed, and so we have been taking in laundry and washing the clothes and getting it back out to those guys. So we're trying to help where we can.
46:38 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Nice.
46:39 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, well, there's people that have lived through some horrendous deficit. There's still dozens. I forget what the last number is Dozens of people that haven't been found.
46:56 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
The last number I saw today was 61 that are still missing 61. That's missing, right? That doesn't even tell you all the other numbers. So, no, it was an absolutely devastating storm, for sure.
47:12 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, caught everybody by surprise and of course you know when things, when water starts rising, what do you do? You go to the mountains, right? You go to the high ground and yeah the high ground is what got hit this time, just in a crazy way.
47:31 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
The survival people will tell you go to the middle, right. The survival people will tell you to go to the middle right, yeah. Because the wind is up top and the water is at the bottom, and so if you're weathering a storm, the goal is somewhere in the middle of the mountain.
47:44 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah.
47:45 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That would be my wilderness first aid tip of the day.
47:49 - David M. Jones (Guest)
All right.
47:51 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Hazardous weather tip of the day. So one of those crazy certifications I hold in my back pocket Awesome. So I'm a scout leader for the high adventure crews, for our local troops. Well, good for you. I do a little bit of outdoor hiking and youth preparation as well.
48:10 - David M. Jones (Guest)
I should have called you before I went on that trip.
48:15 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I don't know, Like at a certain point, boots on the ground, they have the final decision right. Like that's the most important person.
48:26 - David M. Jones (Guest)
You have the eyes and the ears, and so you have to assess for personal safety. Yeah, yeah. Well, like you said earlier, for me this wasn't a rash decision to go off and do this. This wasn't some crazy thing. Some people ask you know, why didn't your daughter cancel the wedding? Well, she had no indication she needed to cancel it. As far as she knew, everybody was getting there. She didn't have cell phone or Internet service either, so she didn't know the extent. It was a small wedding. Most of the people were in town anyway, so they could easily get there. Some people had arrived early they were ahead of the storm, per their original plan, so you know and several were coming from the north, you know so.
49:09 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I mean, it rained that day like we didn't have any. We didn't have any of the stuff that you guys had. It rained.
49:14 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, yeah, exactly. So we're blessed that it all came out well in the end, that there was no power at the church, so it was a candlelight service.
49:27 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
How beautiful, that's how Silent. Night was written, oh really, franz Gubel. Yeah, he wrote it because there was no power and it was a candlelight. Something was wrong with the other instruments and this is one reason why that song is such a famous beautiful, quiet song. Silent Night, holy Night, how about that yeah, so beautiful, beautiful story and all's well.
50:01 - David M. Jones (Guest)
That ends well I did think about turning around, but when I was stopped by the troopers I thought, well, maybe I can go back all the back and then take a big looping route around. And then I looked at the gas gauge and I didn't have enough gas and there was no power just about anywhere. I made it about 30 miles from home before I encountered the stop traffic and the issues, and there was no power anywhere from then on. 30 miles from home before I encountered the stop traffic and the issues, and there was no power anywhere from then on. And so there's no way to get gas. We can only go forward, and I like to think that most dads in my position would have done the same thing.
50:54 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
They would have gone as far as they possibly could go. I I think that's a, that's a fair statement, right, it's? At a certain point there is an element of luck, mindset preparedness, and you just don't know what's coming up against you, and so you make the best decisions that you can make at the moment.
51:12 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yep, yep, and I feel like God was on my side as well, and so it all came together.
51:22 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
For my people who are looking for you know they face the storm and maybe they've come through, but there's always that aftermath and that's really what you were going through. Right, it was like the aftermath of the storm. What are like three top tips that you can use. They should like build into their day or build into their mindset to to go forward, to keep moving forward. What would be your top three?
51:55 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Well, one of them has three parts, ok, and this is a another soundtrack that I live by, whether I'm running or if it's business or life, and that is be strong on the uphills. So uphills is also a metaphor for headwinds, for struggles, for barriers. So be strong when you're facing those situations. Take what the downhills give you it could be a tailwind or some advantage you have. Take it and use it to the most and finish strong. That's the third element. So I always have that in mind in my life. That's an overarching. So I would tell others find something like that that fits you, your style of life, and internalize that. Repeat it over and over again. Tell others so you know they can help hold you accountable to it when they see, maybe, that you're not. Hold you accountable to it when they see, maybe, that you're not.
53:14
The second thing is I always coach my clients and I, when I was teaching college, I always taught students take advantage of every tool available to you for whatever situation you're in. So if it's a computer, if it's a pencil, if it's a reflector, if it's a piece of information, whatever it is, take advantage of that and fold that into your situation, whether it's a problem solving situation or just a regular project. You're moving forward or it's just you know business in general. Take advantage of every tool available. And the third would be something along the lines of faith, and allow your faith to help bring confidence to you in your actions.
54:11 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
I like it. Yeah, nice, I think. Sometimes I say speak your truth, and it's surprising who shows up to help you. Right, but that's part of the faith. That's part of the faith.
54:36 - David M. Jones (Guest)
But it's also a part of putting that energy and creating the confidence in the people around you. Right, I agree Totally, and confidence is contagious. You know, positive attitudes, they're all contagious, especially if you're in a leadership role, because people always look to leaders, including when times are tough. In fact, that's probably the first place they look to. When times are tough. They look to their leaders. Leaders have to convey that confidence, that calm we're not going to panic here, and some resolve, that, yeah, we're going to see this through, we're going to get to the other side. So, yeah, that's part of speaking your truth, being authentic. If you're in a leadership role, having the trust of your people beforehand, before you encounter issues, is hugely important as well.
55:32 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
And I think confidence and trust it's also. There's an element of self-trust when we talk about trust and confidence, like tying those in together. I think there's an opportunity to trust your training, trust your mindset, trust the strength that's are that you've already built up just all those skills that you can move forward through whatever the challenge is that's coming.
56:00 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yeah, and it's interesting in a semi paradoxical way is that sometimes it takes a trial or a test for your people, if you're a leader, for your people to see the full extent of your abilities. In other words, you may not need to use 100% of that on a regular, daily basis of what you have internally, until something occurs and that's the only time that that would come out of you. So that's the only time your people can see it and you gain more trust during those events. So I coach leaders don't shy away from tests. They will work to your advantage.
56:53 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That's a great way for us to end. It's an absolutely fantastic statement. Right, Step up to what's in front of you.
57:00 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Yep, yep, absolutely. That's how you overcome.
57:03 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
That is how you overcome. David, thank you so much for taking this time. Thank you for sharing your entire story where you were, your determination, your love for your daughter and, hopefully, many, many blessings on their wedding and many years together. So any other final words before we wrap up.
57:25 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Well, one part of the story that a lot of people like to hear is well, what did I do with the reflector?
57:31 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
Oh yes.
57:32 - David M. Jones (Guest)
After I finished the walk. So Daniel, my daughter's husband now Daniel and Elizabeth had asked me to say a few words at the reception and to say a blessing over the food. I had something prepared, but then this evening you know, this trek caused me to rethink that. So what I did was I brought the reflector to the reception. There was power at this restaurant, they had power, and I told the story.
58:03
Because we didn't tell Elizabeth beforehand. I asked everybody that. I told don't tell her, this will upset her on her wedding day. That's not what we want. We'll have plenty of time afterwards to tell the story, so let's just wait. So I decided to tell it at the reception. I presented them with the reflector as a wedding gift Probably not many people get reflectors for their wedding gifts and I said whenever you see this, let it be a reminder for you to always protect the other person, especially in your darkest hours or their darkest hours, because that's when you'll need it the most, just like it did for me, and to continue to be a good reflection of God in your walk through life.
58:59 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
So well, david, this has been wonderful. It's been a fantastic hour getting to know a little bit more about you, hearing your story in depth and also just sharing the work you've done along your life and how that prepared you really for being ready for an adventure like this. So thank you very much for sharing. I hope that we do keep in touch and I'm looking forward to hearing more about what your next steps are.
59:27 - David M. Jones (Guest)
Absolutely. Thank you, Angela. It's been a pleasure being here and speaking with you.
59:33 - Angela J. Buckley (Host)
If you would like to contribute to the Red Cross funds for recovery, please look at the links in the show notes to contribute to David Jones's fund. You've just listened to another episode of Overcome to Become. Thank you for joining me, angela Buckley, your host, as we explored actions and mindsets to overcome the overwhelm and beat burnout. Did you know that when you learn to lead yourself, you can effectively learn to lead others? You can apply these skills in your home, at work and in the community. If you'd like to learn more, join us in the Strength in Nature Learning Academy. We are currently featuring the Overcome the Overwhelm course with a 20% off coupon code OTB2024. That's valid until the end of 2024. You can join me in my community at wwwstrengthinnaturecom and on Instagram at creativelyefficient. Thanks for listening. No-transcript.